Aids' Christmas message

Discussion in 'IWT Archives' started by Aidsey Amore, Dec 25, 2013.

  1. #1 Aidsey Amore, Dec 25, 2013
    Last edited: Dec 26, 2013
    Interviewer: Tonight on the most festive event in all the world, we have caught up with Aids Johnson who is spending his christmas working out and spending his time in the IWT headquarters, here in Austin Texas.
    Aids: How many times do i have to tell you, Champ Johnson is what you call me now? Be thankful Jonathan is spending his holiday at a KFC and is unreachable by phone or email.
    Interviewer: Sorry, Champ. Why are you here on the night where the rest of the stars are spending time with their families?
    Champ: Well, being the IWT champion takes a lot of extra hours, spending time with photographers, training for my match at the Royal Rumble, and especially to spend time with low life's like you, even on Christmas Day. Why are you here?
    Interviewer: Well, let's just leave the questions to me, champ. There has been a lot of speculation that your family being taken by Victoria Parker has left you alone, and this is the only place you have to find solace among the general public?
    Champ: You son of a....My entire family isn't gone, but I would be a liar to tell you that things are not any different without the one's who are closest to me spending Christmas together. No reason to buy a tree, no presents under the tree, and I cook, so no catering service to pretend i'm among in these times. So what do I do during this festive time? I kept my contracts for the event, and those people who were planning on working to make my Christmas special, are now enjoying holiday pay, courtesy of the highest earner in the IWT.
    Interviewer: So the rumors tend to be correct. No lady by your side, no friends to enjoy this day with?
    Champ: Who would want to watch me stare at my phone all day, watching in envy of their Christmas stories? Here (Aids hands over a wad of bills from his pocket) Take this, go see your family, and get out of my face.
    Interviewer: Well thank you! Thank you champ! Merry Christmas!

    The interviewer walks away, as his last words seem to tear at Aids, who stares intensely before going back to the bags workout he was previously doing. As the camera fades, you can hear Aids mumbling with each punch "Victoria. *punch* Parker *punch* MY TITLE *continuous punching.*
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  3. [​IMG]
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  4. Kaizer: Oh, I get it. He wants to be Chris Rock to Victoria Parkers' Rhianna!
  5. Chris Rock? [​IMG]
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  8. Aids is awesome (the disease).
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  9. Dat Kid's concubines run into the gym and quickly throw flower pedals around the door. Dat Kid is carried in on a throne by servants. He spots Aids punching a sandbag and saying things with each punch. Kid snaps his fingers and points to Aids. The servants bring him over.

    Are you going to start chanting "I....AM NOT.....IRRELEVANT" next?

    Dat Kid is lowered by the servants. He steps off the throne.

    Is this how you're going to spend your Christmas Day? You're doing a disservice to your lord and savior Jersey Christ. You should be out spending time with your fami- oh wait that's right, you don't have a family. Silly me.

    Dat Kid laughs and angrily turns to his servants and concubines.


    Kid's servants and concubines laugh with Kid.

    I'm beginning to think Victoria Parker did your family a service by kidnapping them. I mean who the hell wants to spend Christmas with a paper champion. I bet it went down like this: Victoria Parker walked in your house looking to kick your ass and found your family, who are all incestuous deformities by the way. They all ran to her and said "Save us! Please! Save us from our irrelevant son!" Then out of mercy, Victoria Parker kidnapped them. Now that way, they get to spend time with someone who ACTUALLY matters.

    Dat Kid begins his workout

    Dat Kid's workout

    Show Spoiler


    Aids you're going one on one with some rookie who's just about as relevant as you and for the title no less. I guess whatever preserves that title reign of yours, am I right? Just know this Aids, you can set all the records you want, but sooner or later someone is going to break your records because this reign you have your last one.

    Dat Kid puts down the weights and motions a servant.

    Do my workouts for me, slave!

    Dat Kid gets back on his throne
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  10. Aids looks at Dat kid before laughing, staring him down before holding up his microphone.

    "Life must be tough when no matter what you do, you'll always be second best." Before laughing and holding up his IWT title at the corner closest to Dat Kid.
  11. Are you drunk again or just delusional? We're in the IWT headquarters gym you idiot. That microphone doesn't work here and what the hell are you doing carrying a mic. Oh and now he's climbing workout equipment and pretending he's on a turnbuckle while holding his title. I bet he's imagining getting a pop from the crowd as well.

    Slaves, move, I am done talking to this delusional fool. Jesus wept

    Dat Kid's servants carry him out of the gym.
  12. are you not watching your hero work out in the gym ring? Drunk? Always. Bigger than you? Also always. Aids laughs at his own stupidity, as Dat Kid realizes Aids is overshadowing him again.