An Open Letter to Jeff Hardy From A Top Assistant:

Discussion in 'TNA Feed' started by TNA, Sep 5, 2015.

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    An open letter to Jeff Hardy:

    As an assistant of an unnamed top assistant here at Impact Wrestling I have become somewhat of an expert in this field. I’m sure, being Jeff Hardy, you are use to others assisting you. Well let me tell you, it might seem simple… but it’s a LOT OF WORK. Below are a few quick tips I’ve listed to help you along your journey to becoming an incredible assistant.

    1) Anticipate needs.

    You have to be ready for anything as a personal assistant. Errands, declining invites to social events, ordering and serving food and knowing generally everything about their life are a few of the top things I would focus on if I were you.

    2) Act quickly.

    I know you are recovering from an injury so don’t take this personally- but don’t be slow. When a high level executive has a request or a need- its usually right away. Examples include:

    If he needs a steak from Ruth’s Chris: haul ass over the speed limit to get there.

    If he needs someone to spot him at the gym: Don’t walk—RUN

    3) Have refreshments available.

    You are assisting a champion! His instrument must be prepared at all time! Not only does he make important calls, speaks in strategy meetings, and does meet & greets with the fans, but he’s also an athlete! Whether he is ringside on in the board room- have water.

    4) Make sure kids aren’t around.

    It’s a proven fact that executives & celebrities hate when children are underfoot during stressful or important times. Backstage: get all the kids out of the way.

    5) Look for cues.

    It’s helpful to have a secret signal between the two of you when he needs you to help him out of an annoying situation like Tyrus asking him for workout tips or Robbie E asking about dry cleaner recommendations.

    6) Confidentially agreements.

    This is just plain smart business Jeff. You’re a smart business man right? We all know we need “get out” clauses to make sure we aren’t left stranded in the dust. I would hate for you to get fired or sued just because you didn’t get it in writing. EC3 is lawyered up 24/7. You should be too.

    7) Don’t play by the rules.

    Our bosses have a lot of money. They can usually talk their way out of almost anything. You need to adapt this philosophy. Law enforcement, TSA, or even a dinner reservation wait lists do NOT apply to your top exec. Learn to sweet talk your way into almost anything to keep your boss happy.

    8) Keep the desperate or destitute out of the way.

    Here’s a secret- Execs really only want to seem like they care for others but they don’t. It’s now your job to keep them moving.

    For example-you might have an unattractive girl trying to flirt with him. Always have an emergency call that he needs to take immediately. Use Aunt D if you need to.

    9) Don’t take things personally.

    If EC3 sends you hateful voicemails or text messages, belittles you in front of others or simply doesn’t acknowledge you publicly- that’s ok!! Don’t be upset. He is a busy man and you are an appendage to help make his life easier. It’s not about us; it’s about them!

    10) Most Importantly: Tuning in to Impact Wrestling on Wednesday nights.

    This may seem like a no-brainer; but let me explain.

    Not only do you, Jeff, tune in to Impact, but also you are ON Impact so I get it. But you’ve probably only been concerned with your matches and rivalries. Now that you are an assistant that’s all changed. You have to watch it through the World Heavyweight Champions eyes. Be on the lookout for other storms brewing throughout the roster and make sure The Undefeated, Undisputed World Heavyweight Champion is aware of everything going on so he can stay on top!

    Jeff: please know that these are merely suggestions. And you don’t have to follow them all…. But I’m just saying…I wouldn’t want to be on EC3’s bad side.

    Good luck!


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