Storyline I ain't need no flair!

Discussion in 'IWT Archives' started by Stopspot, Aug 26, 2013.

  1. *The titantron comes on and we see what looks to be a farm, with a large barn in the background and the roof of a large house peaking out behind it. A couple of chickens and a cat are strolling around on the grounds and you can hear other farm animals. A large tractor and a combine harvester is parked in front of the barn. You can hear the hints of a running engine.*

    Announcer 1: What the... Who's playing with the titantron?

    Announcer 2: I don't remember getting a DVD of Bonanza.

    *The sound of an engine gets louder and louder and an ATV comes blaring onto the screen. Alkaline is sitting on the ATV, dressed in a pair of cargo shorts, a black tank top and with a green bandana tied around his face. In front of him on the ATV he has a Labrador dog. Alkaline parks the ATV in front of the camera and the dog jumps off the ATV. Alkaline turns to the camera, pulls down the bandana and says.*

    AK: Surprised?

    Announcer 1: Alkaline!?

    Announcer 2: We haven't heard from him since Summerslam.

    AK: So Summerslam wasn't the best for me, I'll be the first to admit that. And the brass back at IWT HQ has been making some changes, some new match types, this and that and your typical backstage bullshit. But there's one thing that caught my eye. The IWT championship tournament. I was placed in that tournament, and lough and behold I get to fight someone I have been acing to put a breaking on for a long time. Aids Johnson. It would take a complete idiot to not see that Aids and I don't get along. Quite frankly, I cannot stand the boy. So any chance to put a good ol' fashioned beat-down on him is appreciated.

    AK: But after Summerslam and what happened there, I needed to get away. My IWT career hadn't exactly gone as I wanted it to. I had too many voices in my ears, giving me pointers and tips. I couldn't make out chicken shit from chicken salad to be frank. So I hopped on a plane, left all the bright lights for a while, and went home.

    *Alkaline gestures to the farm behind him.*

    Announcer 1: Who'da thought it, he's a farm boy.

    AK: This, this is the house that made me. This is the place that taught me my life lessons, my roots. I learned about hard work, about not taking shit from anybody and that when push comes to show, you push right back. I learned that no one is going to step on me unless I let them, and I ain't letting anyone step on me no more. I'm done expecting to have things handed to me, I'm going to take, I'm going to earn.

    Announcer 2: Well he sure does seem determined.

    AK: And most importantly, I've learned that I don't need any of that flair that the rest of the boys in the back speak about. “You need some flair to your entrance”, “you need a flashy moveset”, “You need some flashy clothes man”. To all that I say bullshit! Stan Hansen didn't need no god damn flair to be the greatest foreigner in Japan. Bruiser Brodie didn't need no fucking flair! And I ain't going to need no flair to whoop ass throughout this tournament. I'm done with playing the game. I'm here to kick ass!

    *The crowd pops.*

    AK: Aids, Dat Kid with the cane gave us a prime opportunity to settle our business like men. I know that I'll be there on the 27th, will you? I'm walking in to that match with one goal, to leave you in a bodycast. I'm going to whoop your ass between the ropes, outside of the ropes, in the stands or backstage I don't care! As long as I get to break your neck. It doesn't matter who you have in your corner, I'll find a way to end you boy, and it is going to be painful and simple.

    *Alkaline revs up the ATV and zooms off the screen as his new theme music hits and the screen goes black.*

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