Storyline Muff Herman, Your Existence is Your Downfall

Discussion in 'Internet Wrestling Titles' started by Jacob Fox, Mar 20, 2016.

  1. *After the music plays, Schizo addresses why he attacked Muff Herman. He's carrying a stuffed animal penguin around with him. He speaks in a strained voice and constantly keeps looking around and swatting as if he is being attacked by flies.*

    When someone does anything, it seems that everyone always thinks there has to be a reason for it. That things are supposed to make sense. But why does anything have to make sense? Did it make sense when I wrestled a woman in Antarctica in front of a crowd of penguins? Did it?! YES! It did.. but only marginally so! And besides just because that made sense, doesn't mean anything else does. I forget what point I was trying to make there...

    *begins pulling his ear as if to rip it off*

    Muff Herman, you're not a penguin but that's just one of the many things you have working against you. Because even if you were a penguin, i'd have no problem going back to Antarctica and not all the penguins on the entire continent could stop me from finding you... although they'd definitely try. Penguins always try, so you should be happy I'm not a penguin!

    Anyway, the reason I attacked you is simply because you were there. No other reason. So the only way you could have kept from being attacked was if you weren't there. And if you weren't there, then you wouldn't exist and then I couldn't have attacked you. So I hope it makes sense that it was your very existence that has doomed you and you should thank me for trying to take that away from you. Only when I do will you finally be able to know that you no longer exist. *pauses* But you can't know you don't exist when you don't'd have to exist to know that...

    *Begins punching himself in the face in frustration. starts chewing on the penguin... rips its beak off and begins eating it*

    Nothing tastes better than a penguin. And this penguin in only missing its beak. I'm completely willing to give up several pieces of my own body to make sure you end up missing some of yours. And really soon, you'll be missing several.

    Think about it. I'm following you.

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  2. Knew you were going to be a good promoer, you'll be in a title feud in no time.
    • Agree Agree x 2
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