Impact Wrestling (Dec. 3, 2019) returned to its regular style after last week’s 1983 throwback to IPWF. The big story was the return of ODB as proceeds from this NYC show were donated after her food truck business burned down. There was also a slamming three-way between Cage, Eddie Edwards, and Michael Elgin, amusing talk of mizarks and rizats from Johnny Swinger, ODB in the main event against Taya, and much more.
Let’s blitz through the results.
Michael Elgin was asked about being disqualified in the #1 contender elimination match two weeks ago. Is he beating himself up over it? No, but he will beat somebody up over it.
Eddie Edwards vs Cage. Both men fought hard for about 10 minutes until Elgin came in to double clothesline them and put the boots to Edwards. That turned the bout into a triple threat.
Eddie Edwards vs Cage vs Michael Elgin. This three-way went for about 12 minutes. It was even across the board. No one had an edge in the constant flow of action. In the end, Elgin powerbomb tossed Edwards onto Cage in the corner. Elgin then sitdown powerbombed Edwards in the center of the ring for the win.
Inside the Rascalz’ Treehouse. Trey Miguel was agitated about Ace Austin’s MILFy comments toward his mother. The other two kind of agreed with Austin that she was good looking. Trey’s mom popped in to sit down. Trey didn’t want her at the show. She didn’t understand why. Is she a distraction? Trey relented. She made meatloaf for the boys.
Moose on the basketball court. He came up short in that #1 contender elimination bout. Legends sometimes lose, but he has no doubt about being the greatest multi-sport athlete of all-time. Moose shot some hoops on the basketball court. Two dudes with the ball were scared he would beat them up based on his past videos on the golf course and tennis court. Moose said if he makes this three-pointer, he will buy beers. Success. The two dudes celebrated. Moose then beat them up and left one hanging from inside the rim.
ODB returns. Josh Matthews set the scene about wrestling being one big family. They come together when one is in need. ODB’s real life food truck burned down and proceeds from this show will go to her aid. ODB told her story and how she loves her wrestling family. Out came Taya to interrupt.
Taya is longest reigning Knockouts Champion of all-time. This is her show. To ODB, take your McRib smelling ass off her show. Get the lunch lady out of here. Smash! ODB beat up Taya. The main event match was made between ODB and Taya.
Tessa Blanchard and Sami Callihan press conference. Impact promoted the World Championship main event between Tessa and Sami at Hard to Kill on January 12.
Tessa will make history by beating Sami. Sami dislikes Tessa because she is a spoiled brat. This won’t be history, just another title defense. He will treat her like anyone else and crack her f-ing skull. Tessa got angry and the two had to be separated.
Reno Scum & Ace Austin vs Rascalz. In the end, Trey was on the top turnbuckles for high flying to win, then he saw Ace flirting with his mom. Trey attacked with a flurry of punches. Reno Scum won the bout on a roll-up in all that commotion.
Jordynne Grace donated to ODB’s cause by inserting money into her chestiness.
Johnny Swinger hatching a plan. He sat down next to Joey Ryan to lament mizarks like Petey Williams and Ken Shamrock chasing away the rizats. Top guys like Joey and himself need to save the business. Swinger wanted to form a clique. Ryan was half-listening then agreed to Swinger’s plan to interfere later against Williams.
RVD back from vacation. RVD and Katie Forbes returned to Impact. RVD was tired of everyone copying his moves. Tommy Dreamer came out to make peace between by RVD and Rhino by settling it with a match next week, like they used to do. RVD passed. Rhino attacked RVD on stage. About 10 guys ran out to hold Rhino back.
The North playing mental games. Rich Swann received applause backstage for his performance in that #1 contender elimination match. He wanted Mack to think about the tag team open next week. Winner gets a title shot at Hard to Kill. The tag champs entered the scene. They tried to play Swann and Mack against each other by planting the seeds of Mack holding Swann back from his true potential. Swann saw through their ploy, but Mack was clearly considering the issue.
Fallah Bahh plans to fight back against the Desi Hit Squad as long as he is in Impact. That was in response to being beat up two weeks ago.
James Mitchell introduced Suzie to Havok. As long as Suzie respects Havok’s personal space, then the three will be best of friends.
Johnny Swinger vs Petey Williams. During the bout, Swinger waved to the back for Ryan to come out. Ryan didn’t show. Williams ended up winning with a Sharpshooter.
ODB vs Taya. John E. Bravo got drunk from ODB’s flask.
For the finish, Bravo began chanting he’s the champ. Grace came out to take the Knockouts belt from Bravo. That distraction cost Taya the match as ODB won via roll-up.
This week’s Impact was a solid show. It started out strong and kind of tapered off. The opening match was very good with a fancy physical style. The trios bout had the flippy moves. ODB’s return was fun to see, as was Taya’s trash-talk. Their match was alright for what it was. Even though I wasn’t watching Impact on the regular, Taya’s parts were ones I kept an eye on. It seems like she always loses non-title bouts. In this case, I understand it though. The main focal point was supposed to be ODB returning.
My favorite part of the show continues to be Johnny Swinger running his mouth backstage. Using buzzwords like mark, rat, and clique make me laugh. I hope he gets payback on Joey Ryan for stiffing him. That was a dick move.
I think I might have to root for Sami Callihan in his match against Tessa Blanchard. I haven’t seen the whole feud. I believe this is only the fourth week in a row that I began watching steadily. In that time, Sami has not been a terrible person yet. He’s clearly a heel, just not despicable in the past month. Obviously, Tessa has earned her spot, but I agree with Sami that she is coddled by management. The evidence was that press conference. She was the one with a sense of righteousness and she was the one to make physical contact first. In that particular exchange, I saw nothing that makes me want to root for her.
What was your favorite moment from Impact Wrestling? Did you enjoy seeing ODB again?