Promos Where oh where has The Cure's Eye Candy/MMA Specialist been lately??

Discussion in 'IWT Archives' started by Ovaldinho, Aug 20, 2013.

  1. *Ben Dover struts to the ring, with a high amount of focus, mouthing to himself, practising his speech to the raucous and unforgiving crowd*

    Ben Dover: Can one of you virgins in the corner get off your huge saggy ass and pass me a godamn microphone??

    *Ben Dover eagerly snatches a microphone from the timid announcer*

    Dover: Hello boys and girls, it's me, Ben Dover, I knew how much you uninspired, lethargic simpletons have missed my solid wrestling, ravishing looks and my orgasmic tongue transmitting beautiful noises into the IWT microphone. The wait is over, I am back on a permanent basis, partly thanks to a new sponsorship deal with Durex, not that company means anything to the majority of you sexless mammals. This condom company will make me all that MONNAYYYYYYYYYYY! So now I have left my porn agency Brazzers; I would like to thank them for 4 years of amazing business, where I got fuck beautiful ladies on a regular basis, I made mountains of cash, and I made the Porn Industry as prestigious as any other entertainment industry.

    But; in my time off, I did my last ever porno with BRAZZERS; I GOT TO FUCK SASHA GREY, MADELYN MONROE, LISA ANN, JENNIFER WHITE and BREE OLSEN EVEN CAME OUT OF MOTHERFUCKING RETIREMENT, WHEN YOU SAD VIRGINS WATCH THIS PORNO, I DON'T THINK YOU WILL EVER LET GO OF YOUR GENITALIA!!!!

    So now that's out the wayyyyyyyyy.........
    Let's discuss, SummerSlam; or as we might as well call it; CUREslam, My Brethren, my fellow doctors that are a part of The Cure all injected strong CREAMPIE doses into The IWT and certain wrestlers in the IWT, these CREAMPIES have FINALLY CURED THE IWT; WHICH WAS A SHITHOLE UNTIL SUMMERSLAM; of ME-DI-OC-RITITIIIIISSSSSS. Now..... This beautiful destruction of what was once a calm and collected bore-fest, was completely taken over by The Cure, and I wasn't even here, NOW THAT I'VE JOINED THE PARTY, THE IWT MIGHT ASWELL CALL ITSELF CWT; CURES WRESTLING TITLES!

    IWT ROSTER; PREPARE TO BEND OVER TO BEN DOVER!!!!

    *Ben Dover showboats before doing crotch chops and pointing towards his penis, BEN DOVER RIPS OFF HIS VINTAGE SUIT TO REVEAL A "THE CURE" T-SHIRT*
     
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  2. *Duggan comes out, mixed reaction with his rant on face and heels, stops on the stage and laughs, music cuts off*
    Duggan: *Still laughing*... Are you done mate? *Laughing* I'm sorry, *Laughs more* but mate...hahaha... is this really whats in the group known as The Cure? What is this guy? Val Venis?! *Crowd Laughs* Dude... do you really... hehehe... expect me- no, expect us ALL to believe that you have been doing pornos in Brazzers?!?! I thought Nick was bad when it came to show boating sexually but you?! Who let you into that idiot group as the cure?! With you in it, they're downfall will come 3 times as quick. *Duggan continues to laugh* And I thought Nukem was bad... *Continues Laughing, falls on his back to the stage just laughing really hard*
     
  3. *Ben Dover known for professionalism tries to keep a straight face, failing eventually and laughs in Duggans face*

    Ben Dover: Who are you even? Honestly.... The IWT "veterans" bitch about the Cure despite the fact we are harassed by nerds, virgins and wannabes who are yet to realise that their only chance of success in life is by playing Second Life.
    By the way, who's Val Venis? by comparing him to me, he must be successful, rich and skilled. 3 things that you don't even have a simple concept of. Now listen Duggie, I am willing to forget that you just embarrassed yourself in front of me, the IWT and it's fans if you pick up what remains of your dignity, turn arounnnnnnnnnnnnd, leave the IWT and go back to wrestling your toys with your mommy.

    And By the way, I am on Brazzers, not just are you a virgin but you're even scared of looking at porn. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

    *Crowd attempt to hold in laughter, aware of the fact that Dover was very harsh with the way he spoke to Duggan*
     
  4. *Stops laughing, stands back up*
    Dexx: I assure you, I subscribe to French editions of Playboy magazines, and i'm no virgin mate *looks at camera, smiles, raises eyebrows, some ladies scream* but not important right now.

    You don't know me? Doesn't suprise me, I just got here. Now I know I have some things going on with a bitch known as Duke Nukem mate but I can't help myself. My name is Dexx Duggan, i'm The Double X Factor representing the country of Austrailia. Now I don't know much about the cure but I had the prediction of they're self down fall, and by looking at whats in the middle of the ring. It's gonna start off with you. I mean with you in The Cure, we don't need these Crusade guys, looking at you, you don't know it... but your the crusade's secret weapon how they will be successful. All because they have a bitch ranting about the fake legend that is how he lost his own virginity. I mean seriously... I think Sasha Grey, Madeyln Monroe, Lisa Ann, Jeniffer White and Bree Osle would all have restraining on you before you would even start you career in any porn company.
     

  5. Ben Duggan: You're only skeptical to what I say because you're personal life is so abysmal you can't take the fact you are laying eyes on a man who is the definition of success.

    Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuut, I understand because I'm a good man;
    I understand if you want to disown my tantalising porn career
    I understand if you don't believe in the Cure FOR NOW!!!!!!

    BUT NEVER, NEVER, UNDERESTIMATE ME IN THE RING, MY DEAR DUGGIE, THAT'S THE STUPIDEST THING AND THE LAST THING YOU WILL DO IN YOUR PATHETIC AND WORTHLESS LIFE!!

    *Ben Dover throws Duggan a serious look, signalling to everyone; including Duggan that play had certainly ended.

    Before this gets controversial, I shall leave the arena now, if you want to continue this "conversation", then it's going to have be in a physical format.

    BUT; PREPARE TO BEND OVER TO BEN DOVER!
     
  6. #6 C.M. Shaddix, Aug 21, 2013
    Last edited: Aug 21, 2013
    OOC- Decided to make this a dark match, look for the topic where I challenge you